Friday, May 21, 2010

Pause...Play, Pray.

Life has literally been pushing the ‘pause’ button on me lately.
It’s been one thing after the other; I want to blog, I stop even before I start; I want to read a book, it’s over before I get past the first page. At first I thought it was just lethargy, but I realized that it was much more than that. I do know there’s such a thing as a ‘bad day’, but for me I haven’t had any of that in a really long time. I’d gotten so used to contentment and joy that I believed nothing could ever sap me of it. But not these past days. It’s been decisions after decisions. And now I don’t just mean a decision to go someplace, or go after something…I mean a decision to keep the right attitude even though things weren’t particularly going the way I planned. That can be hard.

So after a long time of just letting my day take whatever direction it chooses; I called for a meeting. Well, a meeting with God ;) No…I prayed. Like never before. I needed to hear (feel) Him say, “Go or No!” But silence…

From the beginning of this month (May), I’d been so excited about this week. It’s the 7th week after Easter. The week of Pentecost- Acts 2:1-2. This week, I had all planned out with my little happy self. But I didn’t plan the extras that have now come along. Now I had more to think about. More to pray about. I now had a suddenly, I hadn’t bargained for. But one must keep pressing on... And so I chose 

And so I kept on learning… to stay still, to be quiet, to watch, to pray, to recognize my limits and never surpass them; to follow my heart, not my mind. I was quick to learn what the scripture says about God not being the author of confusion; where He leads, He leads in peace. His Yoke is easy. Never condemning, only convicting and leading always with our hand in His.

So, today I am blogging. I am reading. I am living. Because He has answered in His silence. Hence, I have accepted that not everything must I know. Things happen that tip us off a little, but for me now, I really don’t care. My God is Big enough to make every decision, and when He hasn’t…or no when it seems like He hasn’t, then He really has.

I love the rain…because it’s Him saying, “I’m still here…”



Be still...And Know, That I am God.